Sunday, June 25, 2006
hah.
sorry sweetheart.
i cant be optimistic.
i tried.
but i simply CANT.
dammit lar.
do i like him?
or do i just admire him cos i think he's way too cool?
or izzit just an infatuation?
i wanna talk to him again.
but who am i lar huh?
he still likes her.
i think.
i'm a nobody.
what the fuck am i doing?
i dont even dare.
i cant even bring myself to imagine.
who am i kidding?
can i just not fall for anyone?
can that feeling just disappear?
i know he doesnt like me.
i can FEEL it.
convincing myself to be crooked again doesnt help.
cos i've tried it before.
and i've grown out of it.
i'm straight now.
butches dont excite me anymore.
i'm sad.
i dont wanna like him.
but i just cant.
i dunno why i cant.
maybe cos i dont even wanna try.
i cant imagine what will happen if i hadnt known him.
and i really appreciated knowing him.
he's like the very few friends i dont wanna lose.
so i'll just keep mum.
i just want answers.
stories of my life. 11:28 PM;
